Deep Thoughts by Sparky Polastri

Tales of a crazed dance, musical theatre and cheerleading coach. I've got the blonde, I've got the big smile, I've got the loud voice. I'm missing the boobs.

Saturday, May 27, 2006

Well, last night's show was great. Still some minor glitches, but those are to be expected. On the whole, everything went off well.

But of course, there's still the unpredictable element of working with the kids.

Every night after the show, we do a sweep of the dressing rooms. Any costumes or costume pieces that are left out and not hung up and put away properly get confiscated. Believe you me, if we didn't threaten them with this, the costume room would look like a war zone every night. The kind of war fought with sequined tops and pinstripe suits.

Anyhow, if your costume is confiscated, you have to beg, please, and promise your first born to get it back. We've had some interesting soliloquies on bended knee, and a moving rendition of "I'm a Little Teapot", complete with actions, to name a few.

However, these kids are not stupid. They have now started leaving OTHER people's costume pieces out in hopes of an entertaining show.

The other night, we came into the boy's dressing room, and S's costume was in a ball on the floor. Now, S is a LARGE boy. He is probably 5'9 and solid, and has a ridiculously deep voice so odd that people always ask me "is that his real voice??" Hard to describe him to his fullest extent, but S kinda looks and sounds like a hormonal experiment gone horribly wrong.

Anyhow, we of course take his costume, and for our own personal amusement, decide to hide it in the girl's dressing room, expecting some frivolity to occur.

The next day, we expect an apologetic, embarrassed S. Instead, he is incredulous, and says that his costume was hung up when he left it. Of course, we hear that from EVERY kid, and it's rarely true, but for some reason, I believed him.

I asked "did someone do something to S's costume after he left?"

A hand goes up. That hand belongs to shy, awkward boy, who has been the subject of previous posts. I've not mentioned that shy, awkward boy is nicknamed "Bambi" by his teacher (not to his face) because he is awkward and little and looks like Bambi on that scene on the ice, not having full control of his limbs.

So, the kid who is maybe 4'7 and 60lbs hides the costume of Frankenteenager. Umm....ok. Dude, David and Goliath? Was JUST A STORY. Run for your life.

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